When you read to baby, give it your all

Posted on October 30, 2009 by admin

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If you’re a parent, you probably do laundry, answer the phone, fix dinner and check emails while you settle a sibling fight. Every night.

Multitasking may be the mantra of parenthood . It may seem that juggling multiple things may be the only way to do everything and how you keep your family and work life running. But, there are times when you just. have.to.stop. And do one thing well.

Recent surveys and studies show that, in fact, multitasking decreases our efficiency and productivity, and we actually end up taking longer to finish a task. The age old way of focusing on one activity at a time and giving it undivided attention not only gets the job done well and on time, but also helps get more done in a given time frame.

That said, it may not be easy to follow. Moms can’t just stop multitasking after doing it for countless generations.

However, when it comes to certain activities and aspects of our lives, I think it is very important that we give them the whole-hearted attention they warrant. With our modern day lifestyles, few of us can afford this luxury. Regardless of our strengths and abilities, it’s as if we must learn to do a hundred things at once, or we fail. Some of us may thrive on this kind of pressure. It’s as if we don’t know how to do fewer things at a time anymore. But if you’re like me, you like to take things slower. Sure, I can multitask(who can’t?), but I don’t prefer to, sometimes. But I must anyway.

Driving, studying and writing, for example, are tasks which, I like to be 100% focused on. I don’t eat or chat on the phone and can’t change my baby’s diapers while driving(yes, there are supermoms who can, apparently.) Or maybe I can, but really, really don’t prefer to. I can’t stand to have the TV blaring in the background as I try to write or study. Or even think. But I’ve learned to cope.

When it comes to reading to my daughter though, it’s a whole other issue.

Reading to Baby – Do Not Disturb

While we’re reading, I’m not sure who among the two of us is less tolerant of interruptions. The margin is likely to be very slim.

You see, I consider reading with my daughter ‘our time’. It’s the only time she’ll agree to snuggle up these days. (These impossible 3 year olds!) Pretty much the only time when we don’t argue, “But why?”,” But I like it,”, “No!” or have a negotiation session that would put world leaders to shame.

Reading time is when my daughter and I are in sync.

And I’m pretty sure, that for those few minutes, there’s almost nothing on the planet that’s more important. And even if it is, it can wait. M won’t.

So, I like to make the best of those few minutes every chance we get. Which isn’t as much as it used to be.

But even if it’s just 5-10 minutes, I think that setting that time aside just to read with your baby and do nothing else during that time is critical.

Why it’s important to separate reading time from other activities -

It sends your child the message that reading time is special.
That Mommy or Daddy thinks it’s so important, they don’t allow interruptions. Even from other grown-ups.
And more than anything else, without interruptions or distractions to dilute the joy of reading together, you and your baby truly experience the beauty of the moment and the process.

So, it doesn’t matter whether you read for 5 minutes or 50, whether it’s bedtime or before-you-rush-out-to-work time.

When you’re reading to baby, read. Don’t text. Or answer the phone. Or check the oven. Or stir the pot. Check emails. Engage in a conversation with someone else. Or do anything that takes away from the magic of those few moments.

When you’re reading to your baby, let it be just you and her. Let the rest of the world fade away. Focus on reading, pointing to pictures and words, asking questions, answering questions, making eye contact, sharing a joke or a funny moment, reassuring your baby if she’s disturbed, loving the moment, enjoying the book and savoring the experience you share with your baby.

When you read to your baby, give it your all. Be present 100%.

Soon, it will be over. And you can go back to being supermom.

Library Storytime – Preschool Kids Listen to a Clifford Story

Posted on October 28, 2009 by admin

M and I enjoy story time sessions at our local library. We have been going to these since she was a little baby.

In this video, the librarian reads from a popular Clifford book.

Note how the kids pay attention and respond to her even though they may have heard and read this very book a thousand times.
Also, watch how she varies the tone and pitch of her voice wherever necessary, but does not dramatize so much that it distracts from the story. I believe there’s always something new about reading aloud that I learn when I go to these sessions.
Even if you read to your kids everyday, it’s a good experience for them to hear different people and voices reading to them, at least occasionally. No two people read exactly the same way. So when your child listens to the same story read by different people, she has the opportunity to hear different accents, voices, speeds of reading and other subtle variations in reading that expand her learning and enrich her experience. This is why supplementing your reading with audio books or listening to the news is an idea worth exploring.
My favorite part of story time is just to watch M enjoy herself, observe her expressions, the way she processes all that she hears (especially since we don’t speak English at home) and her general response to the whole experience.

Watch this space for more story time and read aloud videos.

I would love to hear about your story time experiences.

Baby Books For Your Bundle of Energy

Posted on October 27, 2009 by admin

When it comes to books and your baby, sometimes, cuddling up to read just doesn’t cut it. There are times when your baby needs romping action. And maybe you do too. For cold, rainy days when your kids can’t play outside or when you’re just in the mood for some action-packed reading with your tot, pick up a book like From Head to Toe, by Eric Carle. This lesser known book from the author of The Very Hungry Caterpillar is just as engaging, with its trademark cut-paper collages and generous use of color.

Baby Books with DIY Fun

It has references to different kinds of land and sea animals and how they move, in the process, gently nudging your little reader to get up and get moving himself. “Can you move your head?”, “Can you clap your hands?” ” Can you arch your back?” are some of the questions you and your child will have fun finding the answers to, not just by reading, of course.

This is one book that wraps reading and physical activity together in an enjoyable package of animal movements, bright pictures of animals and children and easy-to-follow text.

From Head to Toe is a great book to try if you’re just starting to read with your pre-schooler or if you both need a change from routine reading or on a particularly gloomy day when you just can’t tell what’s making your baby(and you) so cranky!

Other action-packed books that toddlers and pre-schoolers may enjoy -

Toddlerobics Animal Fun

Dance to the Rescue – Dora the Explorer Series ( a favorite of M’s since she was about 6 months old)

What are some of your favorite action books to share with kids?

How Do You Ensure a Healthy Lifestyle for Your Kids?

Posted on October 23, 2009 by admin

Reading. Physical Activity. Social Skills.

For many parents(yours truly included), combining these essential, but seemingly exclusive aspects of child development is a challenge.

As a parent of a young daughter, I see that she craves different kinds of stimulation and activity during the course of a day. Yes, she seems to like books and reading with me, but I am absolutely sure it’s not all she wants to do all day, every day. There are days when she just prefers other activities over reading. And some days, she’ll just bring me book after book to read.

I’ve stayed home with my daughter for most of her 3 years. I realize how fortunate I am to have this opportunity to stay home and spend time with her during her baby and toddler years. But, I’m sure you’ll agree that keeping an active young kid engaged creatively for over 12 hours a day, every day is not easy. It’s fun. Fulfilling. Exciting and all that. But it’s a challenge in its own way. Like many parents, I try to find a balance between a variety of activities so she gets to do a little bit of everything and a lot of what she loves so that she isn’t too bored all that often.

Luckily for me, I like to read and we introduced her to books early on. So at least that’s one activity we do everyday that’s both easy and fun for both of us. But you can only read for so long. Like everything else, it gets tedious at some point.

I’d love to know how other parents have tackled this situation with their kids. I’m sure there are parents out there with far more challenging circumstances – those with more than one kid, single parents, kids with special needs…And it would be great to learn the different ways parents keep young kids busy at home, without the excessive use of TV or other multimedia aids.

As for me, besides reading, which has been central to our daily routine, there are a few other activities M and I enjoy regularly. I consciously try to mix in a little bit of physical exercise and outdoor activity so that she has a chance to develop in all respects and explore all aspects of her personality. Since I’m not an outdoorsy, athletic kind of person myself, I want to ensure that she at least has the opportunity to try some activities when she’s still young and is yet to form rigid opinions. So, here’s a look at how M and I spent most of our time, during these first three years -

- Mom and Baby Exercise Session. We’d simply exercise together. She’d watch me do simple stretches or yoga postures and mimic me. It turned out to be a lot of fun. And me shedding a few pounds was a bonus. A great children’s book that is good for reading together and for getting your child some exercise, is Toddlerobics. It’s got lots of silly, fun and natural movements and exercises that your baby can try as you read the book together. It was one of M’s favorite books when she was about 18 months old.

- Dance Like Nobody’s Watching. ‘Cos nobody is. So just let go. Dancing uninhibitedly with your child could be one of the most exhilarating experiences. You will be amazed at how quickly it eases stress and puts you in a lighter frame of mind. M and I often enjoy dancing to Dance Baby Dance, which has a fast and peppy instrumental version of popular children’s songs.

- Story time trips. Reading together at home is great. But story time at the library or book store is even more fun, because you’ll meet other kids and moms, play games, do fingerplays and watch someone else do the work while you relax! These trips are great for your kids’ social development as well, since she gets to see lots of other adults and kids, learns to listen, communicate and interact in a group. Especially important for kids who stay home and haven’t started daycare or pre-school yet.

- Stationary Activities. On days when you’re mostly indoors, coloring, doodling, singing, puzzles, playing with building blocks, skimming through flash cards, looking at family pictures, counting things, pretend play, playing with toy trains, Doctor kits and other musical toys are all great activities that aren’t too taxing on your tired body and can be considered creatively stimulating at the same time.

- Physical Activities. Rolling or kicking a ball, playing hide and seek or tag(indoors or outdoors in a safe environment), jumping on a trampoline( or occasionally the family bed), teaching your kid to do a somersault, taking a walk or running alongside your kid’s tricycle are great ways to get a work out for yourself and for your baby.

- Chores. No, I’m not talking child labor. But you do know that your little guy enjoys helping you, don’t you? Kids love to do everything they see their parents do. My daughter loves unloading the dishwasher. She helps me transfer clothes from the washer to the dryer. She enjoys wiping the kitchen cabinets with a towel. At first, every time I had to do one of these chores, I’d try to convince her to go play or read or ‘do something quietly while Mommy finishes her work’. Of course, I wasn’t successful. Then I realized that simply letting her do it would solve the problem. So, now, every time I unload the dishwasher or use the dryer, I enlist her help. Not only is she happy to help, but, for those few minutes, I don’t have to worry about what she’s up to or how to keep her engaged while I finish the chore. And guess what, she asks some of the most intelligent questions and we’ve had some of our best conversations during these moments.

- Talk. Did you know that 3-year olds can have growing vocabularies ranging from 300 to 1000 words or more? They pick up most of it by hearing you or others speak or read. Engaging your child in conversation is among the best ways to enhance his knowledge, vocabulary, self esteem, communication skills and to learn about his personality traits, likes, dislikes, fears and views. Long before I had my daughter, I had friends telling me how amazed they are at the kind of questions their kids ask them and the way they observe everything that’s being said around them and how they apply those words or phrases appropriately without even being taught. I’m experiencing this first-hand now, and boy am I blown away by the way the human brain is designed. It’s true. Kids do observe and register a lot more than we realize and they astonish us with their application when we least expect it. So, the more we talk to our kids, have conversations, encourage questions and pay attention, the more we both grow and learn in the process. And since talking doesn’t requite props or gadgets or batteries, it’s one of the easiest and most natural ways to keep kids engaged, for hours even, no matter where you are and what the weather.

This is just the tip of the ice berg. I’m sure there are hundreds of other creative ways for parents to keep kids busy in a constructive manner. We may not all be the same when it comes to coming up with creative strategies or handling kids with patience. But I guess as a collective group, parents can learn a lot from each other. And the more ways we learn to engage our kids, the easier it will be for us to keep them occupied without the help of video games or TV shows. And the more parents who are determined to spend creative, quality time with their kids, the healthier, smarter, more socially responsible and creative our kids are likely to turn out to be. And that, can only be a good thing for everybody.

I would really like to know -
Intellectual stimulation, social activity, physical exercise – how do you ensure your kid gets a healthy dose of everything?

Could Excessive Reading Have a Negative Effect On Kids?

Posted on October 22, 2009 by admin

Is there such a thing as too much reading?

With all that’s being said about how important learning to read is, how reading makes kids smarter and keeps them in school and why parents should start reading to babies from an early stage, the last thing one might expect to hear is whether too much reading could in fact be harmful.

But there are a few things that prompted me to wonder about this.

Before I share them with you, let there be no doubt that I believe that learning to read and cultivating the habit of reading is absolutely crucial to leading a fulfilling, meaningful life in modern times and to keep evolving through one’s lifetime. Like many parents, I began reading to my daughter when she was just days old and hope that she develops a lifelong love of books.

But, what I’m wondering about is the effect of being addicted to reading so much that it leaves little time, enthusiasm or energy for any other activity.

On one hand we have kids whose senses are glued to multimedia stimulation round-the-clock and who find it a laborious task to even consider picking up a book to read. And this is indeed a real problem that needs addressing in every part of the world. However, as worrisome as this is, on the other end of the spectrum, there is a smaller, but surely, significant group of kids (what do they like to call them these days – I’m told Geeks and Bookworms are so 20th century!) who bury themselves in books, only to emerge for an occasional meal or unavoidable social event.

I’ve seen cousins, nieces and friends’ kids who fall into this category. Their parents often complain about how their kids never leave their rooms or go out to meet friends or engage in conversation with visiting relatives – the very traits that other parents, I’m sure, wish their kids showed, at least to a slight degree!! But, what prompts these parents to worry is the fact that when their kids are engrossed with reading, they don’t seem to prefer what is considered a normal social life, they seem to get very little exercise and seem to know everything happening around the world but are unaware of what’s going on in their own living room.

So, between kids who won’t pick up a book to read even if it was the last thing they had to do and kids whose lives revolve around books and little else – where does the solution lie and what is the real problem anyway?

As it turns out, reading by itself is not the problem or even a solution. It’s what you read, how much you read and how you process and use what you read that really has any impact.

As in everything else, finding and striking the right balance is a trick. It’s about getting kids who never read to pick up at least one book a week and read at least for a few minutes a day. And kids who can’t be separated from their books to put their books down for at least a few minutes a day to get some physical exercise or engage in some kind of outdoor activity. Of course, an activity, hobby or part-time job that gives them the chance to enjoy what they love doing in a different setting or with a different purpose could be a great solution. A bookworm might enjoy volunteering in the library’s youth section or tutoring kids who need help with reading. In the process he may get the opportunity to meet like minded people or make new friends and overcome his shyness. For teenagers, you could even combine a book club with an outdoor activity, by holding the book club meetings in a park, bowling alley or as they take a walk.

Although the benefits of reading are manifold for children of all ages, the problems and risks associated with low levels of physical and social activity such as childhood obesity, low self esteem, excessive shyness and loss of touch with reality are equally important to bear in mind.

There are many ways to combine your child’s love of reading with his need for physical activity and social exposure, some of which I will explore in the next post.

I would really love to know how you strike a balance between reading and other activities when it comes to your kids. Please share your tips. Other parents may find them useful.

Baby Book Review – Where Did Bunny Go?

Posted on October 22, 2009 by admin

I love children’s books which have story-lines that can be played out. They give us a lot to do long after we’ve finished reading the book.

One such book that M and I enjoyed immensely is Where Did Bunny Go, by Nancy Tafuri. This sequel to Will You Be My Friend is a charming little tale about friendship, set against the backdrop of a hide and seek game.

Children's Book About Friendhsip

Best friends Bunny and Bird are enjoying a gorgeous snow day around the apple tree, when they’re joined by Chipmunk and Squirrel. The four friends play a game of hide and seek, each running off in a different direction to hide with Bird being It. Bird finds Chipmunk and Squirrel, but Bunny is nowhere to be seen. As the friends wonder and speculate on where Bunny may have gone, we are taken through a range of emotions. Is he lost? Has he run away? Would he really leave his friends? Where could Bunny possibly be?

Just as Bird is about to give up on her best friend, the story takes an expected, but sweet turn and the friends are reunited.

A charming baby book about friendship

M and I enjoyed this book together several times. What I loved most about it are

- It’s clean and simple to follow.

- It has crisp, clear illustrations and text against a white background – my favorite feature in children’s books.

- Like I said before, kids can relate to it. M loves to play hide and seek, which made it even more fun to read this book with her. She could relate to how each animal ran to find a good spot to hide.

- It reinforces the concept of friendship. M just turned 3 and is beginning to understand friendship. They’re learning about friends this week at daycare. I think this book has helped her figure out what friends are all about and how one shows her friends that she cares about them.

- And as always, it gives us many fun activities to do when we’re done reading.

Activities to try after reading the book

- Play hide and seek with your kid pretending to be Bunny and Bird. If there are others at home, include them in the game.

- Give your child a chance to spot each animal in the book before Bird does.

- Come up with other places the animals could have hidden in.

How to Tell if Your Baby Loves Reading

Posted on October 12, 2009 by admin

Pretending-to-be-the-storyteller

Rock your baby and she falls asleep. Pick her up and she stops crying. It’s nice when your baby gives you clear indications that your efforts at making her happy have been successful. At least, you know you’re giving her what she wants.

But, how do you know if your baby’s enjoying the books you read to her?

How can you tell if she’s really benefiting from all that reading you do or if she even likes it.

Some signals are straightforward enough. But, sometimes, you may have to perk up your observation antennae to read the signs. When you pay just a little more attention than usual, you’ll be surprised at how much you can discover about the kind of books your baby enjoys, her favorite time to read to her and even the tone of voice or pitch she prefers. So, what are some of those signs?

- Your baby seems more relaxed, less agitated, settles down in your lap or by your side. It’s not easy to get a baby who’s begun moving independently to stay in one place for more than a few minutes. So, if your baby continues to hang around after you’ve been reading a few minutes, you can safely assume you’re doing something right.

- She pretends to read. She may not know her left hand from her right yet, but she already thinks she can read. If your baby picks up a book at random and begins to ‘read’ it, imitating you in the process, it’s a clear sign that she enjoys it.

- She likes being around books. She enjoys visits to the book store and library. She looks at picture books by herself, even if just for a few minutes. It doesn’t matter if she holds the books upside down or if they’re just board books. The fact that she chooses to engage herself with books is proof enough.

- She responds to you as you read to her. Very young babies may flap their hands or start kicking in the air rapidly when they realize you’re reading to them. They may smile at you, look at you wide-eyed or make cooing noises. They may even try to ‘answer’ when you ask a question. They may try to grab the book (even if only to chew it.) As babies grow older, they begin to point to things they recognize, and later to label them. They enjoy turning pages. They love choosing the books they want to read.

- She asks questions. Lots of them. If you have been reading to your child since she was very young, you are likely to see that as she grows older, she becomes more and more curious about the characters and events in the books you read. She is bound to ask you why a certain character acted in a certain way or what a word means, or where a certain place is and whether you can go there. The more you read, the more she asks. The more you tell her, the more interested she is in learning even more.

- She makes connections. Your baby begins to find relations and associations between various aspects of real life and the ones in the books you read. For example, your baby may experiment with dropping cheerios from her snack box as you take a walk in the park. Of course, she’s only trying to ensure she finds her way back like Tom Thumb did. Or maybe she’ll ask the mirror who the fairest of them all is.

- She chooses reading over (gasp!) TV. And although this might not happen very often – when it does, you can finally pat yourself for a job well done. All that reading to your baby has indeed begun paying off when you ask your little, independent thinker “TV or Book?” and on one of those rare evenings, she actually replies, “ Book”.

And that’s really the only reason you need to start reading to your kids today.

Reading to your baby – What’s in it for you?

Posted on October 6, 2009 by admin

Reading to baby is mostly about helping him form connections and new networks in his brain. About language development, comprehension, vocabulary, communication skills and all those other wonderful things your baby experiences every time you read or communicate with him.

But, beyond all that – the improved memory, the enhanced understanding, the enriched vocabulary for your baby – is there anything in it for you?

You might be in for a surprise.

I think reading with my baby has been just as beneficial to me, if not more, as it has been to my baby. And I suppose the same could be true for any parent who reads to his or her child regularly.

The established fact that reading with your child has a lasting impact on his life ought to be enough for anyone to start from day one. However, if you’re wondering how you’re going to squeeze in reading time in the midst of a gazillion chores and work and bills and feeding and diaper changing…maybe, looking at it in a different light will help.

Read to you baby not because it is one more thing you have to do for him, but because it is something that has several benefits for you.

- Reading with your baby relieves stress. It’s a great way to unwind. You don’t have to worry about pronunciation, punctuation, diction or speed. (Although paying attention to these isn’t a bad thing.) Simply pick up a book, pick a quiet corner, cuddle up, forget about life, work and the next meal and start reading. Keep going for at least 10 minutes. Trust me. They will probably be the most relaxing 10 minutes in a new parent’s life.

- Reading helps you bond with your baby. If there’s any doubt at all in your mind whether your baby will like you, or if your very best efforts will be good enough for your baby – just spend a few minutes reading to your baby everyday. You will feel your doubts vanish.

- Reading provides you much needed rest. Babies are supposed to sleep 20 hours. Yeah right. In a month, maybe. It’s no secret that you won’t get much shut eye during the initial weeks, when you probably crave it the most. Which is why you have to master the art of sneaking in rest, when your baby’s not looking. What better way to do that than to trick the little bugger into thinking you’re bonding (and maybe you are), when you’re really just enjoying some down time. Just pick a comfortable spot and position – maybe in your favorite couch or rocker, settle down with baby and a book and rest..err..read. Reading involves almost zero physical activity and hence is a great way to relax your body. It’s not the same as sleeping, but it’s close.

- Get your own reading done. Who says it has to be Goodnight Moon or Peter Rabbit every night? Pick up the latest issue or Vogue or the paperback you’ve been wanting to read. Your baby won’t know the difference. No insult to his intelligence intended, but, in the initial months, what you read to your baby is not as important as the fact that you read to him everyday. So, if you enjoy reading yourself, there’s just no better way to have the cake and eat it at the same time. Reading your favorite magazine columns out loud to your newborn may feel somewhat awkward at first. But, consider the fact that you will enjoy this indulgence only for a few more months, before your baby discovers that he has a mind and will of his own and that he can actually exercise it. I bet, now, this suggestion probably doesn’t seem all that silly, eh?

- Reading to baby now, frees up your time in the future. Think of it as a long term investment. You read to your baby every night for the first few years. He gets hooked onto reading. He can’t wait to get his hands on books. He can’t help reading every chance he gets. He doesn’t need you to keep him engaged all the time. He knows what to do when he’s bored. He simply picks up a book and reads. Just like his mom or dad used to when he was a baby. Can you see how much more pleasant this will make future plane rides, road trips and wait times?

- Read to save. Reading’s got to be one of the most inexpensive hobbies around. If you use your library card well, it might actually cost you nothing. Also, every minute you spend reading to your baby, is a minute saved from shopping or mall hopping or other indulgences you can actually do without. Reading to your baby when she is very young instills in her the love of books early on. So she is less likely to be attracted by other stimuli and more likely to want to read or be read to. I’m not suggesting you deprive your child of toys or fun outings which are more expensive and perhaps more entertaining ways of engaging a child than reading. (And I acknowledge they’re life savers.) But in the long run, you will probably end up spending less on gadgets and toys compared to those parents whose kids haven’t been exposed to reading. Books need no batteries, less storage, can be borrowed free of cost and require no accessories to be enjoyed. So if you’re reading to your baby, you’re probably closer to your dream retirement already.

So, read to your baby, not just for his well-being, but for yours.

Baby Loves Books

How Reading to Kids Enriches Lives, Expands Horizons, Changes Attitudes

Monthly Archives: October 2009